Life and Death

I am still here.  My family member that I told you about that was diagnosed with a terminal illness a little while ago is not.  I have been out of town helping family and attending funeral services.  From being diagnosed to passing away, only a month has passed.  I suppose we should be happy that the suffering was minimal.  Better to be short than drag on for months, but it doesn't make it any easier when you think about the fact that they were fine the last time you saw them.  Whenever someone passes so quickly you hope that they know how very much you loved them, and you make sure that those that are left behind are taken care of and know your love as well.

Loss of a loved one is always a reminder of how precious life is and how we are not promised a long life on this earth.  When I think of the possibility of being taken from my family it reminds me of all the preparations, wishes, and plans that should be made and known.  No one likes to think of their own mortality, but one should always be prepared to leave their family with the least amount of upheaval.  Here are a list of things that everyone should have and they should be kept in one place:

 

Will: If you do not have one...especially if you have children...you need to get one NOW!  You want to make the unfortunate transition as easy as possible for your loved ones.  You do not want people arguing over your money, your children, and your other assets.  You also don't want your family to have to deal with the uncertainty of your wishes.  At most, they cost a few hundred dollars.  At least, you can get a simple one over the internet.  Consider adding a power of attorney.

Life Insurance Policies: Cheapest peace of mind that you can purchase for your family.  Most companies provide a small policy to cover funeral costs.  We have a policy that would allow me to take some time with the children before going back to work if I were to lose Levi, a policy that would more than cover childcare if he were to lose me, and a small policy on each of our children for $35 per month.  Keep in mind that you cannot collect on life insurance until you receive a death certificate which can take a couple of months.  Make sure you have an emergency fund.

Your Wishes: Make sure that your loved ones know your wishes.  Sure no one likes to talk about it, but it will help your family to know that they are giving you what you wanted.  Cremation, Burial, Open Casket, Closed, Church Service/Visitation etc. etc.  If your family knows what you want, then they are not having to make so many decisions while in grief.  Put it in writing if you want and place it with these important documents.  If you want to be buried...buy a plot. 

Access:  Not only will your loved ones need access to your assets but they will also need to know your passwords to everything from facebook to your bank account.  It is amazing how quickly medical costs can pile up.  You want your family to be able to pay for these bills and not be hounded by collectors.  You want them to be able to cancel memberships, etc. with ease.  Review this list yearly as passwords/memberships change.

It is a shame that the death of a loved one is often what reminds us what is truly important in life.  It is also a shame that it doesn't take long to get busy again and forget.  If I were to ask you what was most important to you, I bet it isn't a what at all, but several whos.

If I were to ask you what experiences have been your favorite, I bet it involves spending them with those you love.  Sure, we have to work and we have to scrub the toilet and other things that may not be fun, but when was the last time you called a family member to say hello, or had lunch with a friend, taken your spouse or your kids on vacation?  Do you have a bucket list?  I am sure that mine will change with time and age, but here are just a few things on mine:

1. Raise loving, happy, faithful children
2. Make sure my spouse never doubts my love
3. Take the kids to the Grand Canyon
4. Drink Wine in Italy after standing in the Colosseum
5. Visit all 50 states
6. Take the family to Disneyworld...again
7. Walk green fields in Ireland and enjoy a beer in a pub
8. Climb a mountain
9. Hike all the trails in the area I live
10. Parasail, ski, skydive, cliff dive, and any number of other wild craziness

What is on your bucket list?